MASTER 
NEGA  TIVE 

NO.  93-81412 


MICROFILMED  1993 
COLUMBIA  UNIVERSITY  LIBRARIES/NEW  YORK 


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A  UTHOR: 


SCHROEDER, 
THEODORE  ALBERT 


TITLE: 


CULTURE  AND 
CULTURINE 

PLACE: 

[NEW  YORK] 

DA  TE: 

[1 904?] 


COLUMBIA  UNIVERSITY  LIBRARIES 
PRESERVATION  DEPARTMENT 

BIBLIOnRAPHIC  MTrRQFQRM  TAR^FT 


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immrmm 


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1  '         ^ 

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21     Schroeder,  Theodore  ^  18G4- 1953.         | 
v^X     Culture  and  culturine,  being  a  few  wise  and  wick-^ 
ed  remarks,  by  Theodore  Schroeder...  an  address  de-j 
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BEING  A  FEW 

WISE  AND  WICKED 
REMARKS, 

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63  EAST  59tli  ST.        NEW  YORK 

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AN  ADDRESS  DELIVERED  BEFORE  THE  SOCIETY 
FOR  IMPROVING  THE 

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Capital     $  500.000. 
Surplus  $  250.000. 


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Salt  Lake  City.  Utah. 

July  30 »  1904. 


We  take  pleaaur 


TO  WHOM  IT  EAT  COHCERH: 

tn^rererringjto  the  ?ar- 
ners  Ut«di  Loan  ABSOoiaffe^^thjese  who  ire. desirous 
of  investing  in  securities  based  upon  ioproved  fanss. 
It  was  for  the  purpose  of  negotiating  first  moxft* 
gage  loans  on  suoh  security  that  the  Association  was 
incorporated. 

?0T  orer  twenty  years  we  hare  known  and 
done  business  with  the  officers  who  direct  its  pol> 
Icyt   and  we  hart  found  them  capabls»   conserratiTO 
aen*     Their  characters  are   irreproachable*     We  be- 
liere  that  any  loans  made  or  offered  for  sale  by 
them  would  be  safe  inresti 


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A  WORD  TO  THE  WISE! 

The  First  Mortgages  above  referred  to  are  as  safe  as 
Cjoverment  Bonds.     The  security  is  three  times  the  value  of  the    , 
sum  loaned.    They  will  net  you  6  per  cent.     Interest  coU    * 
lected  by  me  without  charge.     These  First  Mortgages,  in 
sums  from  $250  upwards,  are  for  sale  by  me.    Investigation 
and  correspondence  solicited. 

THEO.  SCHROEDFR,         J 

63  East  59th  St.,  New  York  City. 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE. 


BY  Cnltnrine  I  mean  the  superficial  evidences,  un- 
accompanied by  the  reality  of  culture.  As  no  one 
can  draw  a  precise  line  between  health  and  disease,  nor 
between  common  knowledcre  and  science,  so  no  one  can 
accurately  define  either  culture  or  culturine.  We  can 
only  learn  the  symptoms  by  which  we  may  detect  the 
counterfeit  when  it  has  orotten  far  enoucrh  away  from  the 
real  to  be  beyond  the  borderland  of  doubt. 

In  its  last  analysis  true  culture  manifests  itself  most 
clearly  when  it  results  in  the  application  of  very  great 
wisdom  to  even  the  smallest  affairs  of  life.  But'^this 
does  not  help  us  much,  for  the  questions  still  remain, 
What  is  wisdom?     What  is  an  education? 

Prof.  Huxley  describes  the  truly  cultured  man  when 
he  defines  an  education  in  these  words  :  ''Education  is 
the  instruction  of  the  intellect  in  the  laws  of  Nature, 
under  which  name  I  include  not  merely  things  and  their 
forces,  but  men  and  their  ways  :  and  the  fashioning  of 
the  affections  and  of  the  will  into  an  earnest  and  loving 
desire  to  move  in  harmony  with  those  laws.  That  man, 
I  think,  has  had  a  liberal  education  who  has  been  so 
trained  in  youth  that  his  body  is  the  ready  servant  of  his 
will,  and  does  with  ease  and  pleasure  all  of  the  work 
that,  as  a  mechanism,  it  is  capable  of ;  whose  intellect  is 
a  clear,  cold,  logic  engine,  with  all  its  parts  of  equal 
strength,  and   in  smooth    working  order  ;  ready,    like  a 


U.S.  OCPOSITDRV 

S^9tcetNalt0nal  Bank 

Capital     $  500.000. 
Surplus  $  250.000. 


d05Q 


orriccns 

I»HiaS.  MUT.         MOSCSTNATCHCM.VKtMitt 


Salt  Lake  City. Utah. 

July  30,  1904, 


TO  WHOM  IT  EAT  C05CERH: 

We  take  pleaaun 
mere  Ut«di  Loan  AssooiacfT] 


re/erring  Xo  the  ?ar- 
i^e  who  Ij'e  , desirous 


of  investing  in  seourities  baaed  upon  ioproved  feums* 
It  was  for  the  purpose  of  negotiating  first  moxtt* 
gage  loans  on  such  security  that  the  Association  wm 
incorporated* 

yor  orer  twenty  years  we  hare  known  and 
done  business  with  the  officers  who  direct   its  pol- 
icy,  and  we  hare  found  them  capable,   oonserratiTe 
Ben*     Their  characters  are   irreproachable.     We  be- 
lisre  that   any  loans  made  or  offered  for  sale  by 
them  would  be  safe   inresti 


I 


i 


i 


A  WORD  TO  THE  WISE! 

The  First  Mortgages  above  referred  to  are  as  safe  as 
Cjoverment  Bonds.     The  security  is  three  times  the  value  of  the    , 
sum  loaned.     They  will  net  you  6  per  cent.     Interest  coU    ^ 
lected  by  me  without  charge.     These  First  Mortgages,  in 
sums  from  $250  upwards,  are  for  sale  by  me.     Investigation 
and  correspondence  solicited. 

THEO.  SCHROEDFR,        | 

63  East  59th  St.,  New  York  City. 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE. 


BY  Culturine  I  mean  the  superficial  evidences,  un- 
accompanied by  the  reality  of  culture.  As  no  one 
can  draw  a  precise  line  between  health  and  disease,  nor 
between  common  knowledge  and  science,  so  no  one  can 
accurately  define  either  culture  or  culturine.  We  can 
only  learn  the  symptoms  by  which  we  may  detect  the 
counterfeit  when  it  has  gotten  far  enough  away  from  the 
real  to  be  beyond  the  borderland  of  doubt. 

In  its  last  analysis  true  culture  manifests  itself  most 
clearly  when  it  results  in  the  application  of  very  great 
wisdom  to  even  the  smallest  affairs  of  life.  But^'this 
does  not  help  us  much,  for  the  questions  still  remain, 
What  is  wisdom?     What  is  an  education? 

Prof.  Huxley  describes  the  truly  cultured  man  when 
he  defines  an  education  in  these  words  :  ''Education  is 
the  instruction  of  the  intellect  in  the  laws  of  Nature, 
under  which  name  I  include  not  merely  things  and  their 
forces,  but  men  and  their  ways  :  and  the  fashioning  of 
the  aflfections  and  of  the  will  into  an  earnest  and  loving 
desire  to  move  in  harmony  with  those  laws.  That  mant 
I  think,  has  had  a  liberal  education  who  has  been  so 
trained  in  youth  that  his  body  is  the  ready  servant  of  his 
will,  and  does  with  ease  and  pleasure  all  of  the  work 
that,  as  a  mechanism,  it  is  capable  of ;  whose  intellect  is 
a  clear,  cold,  logic  engine,  with  all  its  parts  of  equal 
strength,  and  in  smooth   working  order  ;  ready,   like  a 


f 


■1 


2  CUI.TURE   AND  CULTURINE. 

Steam  engine,  to  be  turned  to  any  kind  of  work,  and  spin 
the  gossamers  as  well  as  forge  the  anchors  of  the  mind  ; 
whose  mind  is  stored  with  a  knowledge  of  the  great  and 
fundamental  truths  of  Nature  and  of  the  laws  of  her 
operations  ;  one  who,  no  stunted  ascetic,  is  full  of  life 
and  fire,  but  whose  passions  are  trained  to  come  to  heel 
by  a  vigorous  will,  the  servant  of  a  tender  conscience  ; 
who  has  learned  to  love  all  beauty,  whether  of  Nature 
or  of  art,  to  hate  all  vileness,  and  to  respect  others  as 
himself.** 

Other  wise  men  tell  us,  that  man  is  best  educated 
who,  having  the  largest  store  of  well  ordered  facts,  can 
most  clearly  see  and  most  accurately  describe  the  differ- 
ence  between  allied  phenomena.  Progressive  increase 
of  intelligence  consists  in  adding  to  our  supply  of  classi- 
fied experience,  accompanied  by  the  progressive  sub- 
classification  of  phenomena,  and  it  is  manifested  as  real 
culture  only  by  an  ever  refining  sense  of  justice.  To 
most  persons  a  generalization  conveys  a  concrete  concept 
only  by  having  it  pointed  out  by  way  of  illustrations. 
So  then,  that  is  what  will  now  be  handed  out,  by  con- 
trasting the  symptoms  of  culturine  with  those  of  the 
real  thing. 

The  cultured  person,  when  not  enjoying  needed  recre- 
ation,  is  elevatingly  occupied  in  the  study  of  man  or 
nature,  or  in  the  real  thinker*s  interpretations  of  these. 
The  victims  of  fake  culture  are  ever  busy  hunting  for 
new  stimulents  to  relieve  them  from  that  boredom  which 
accompanies  a  purposeless  existence.  Hence  theaters, 
churches  and  horse  races  are  popular. 

Culturine  prompts  people  to  be  more  concerned  about 


1 


t 


CULTURE    AND    CULTURINE  3 

the  adornment  of  their  bodies,  than  of  their  minds.  The 
culturined  are  more  punctilious  about  how  you  feed  your 
face,  than  how  you  exercise  your  brains  ;  they  are  more 
concerned  about  your  public  use  of  a  toothpick  than 
about  the  public  utility  of  your  life  ;  they  rate  you  more 
by  the  kind  of  a  visiting  card  which  announces  you,  than 
by  the  superior  intelligence  or  elegance  of  your  conversa- 
tion after  admission. 

Where  culture  prompts  the  quest  for  new  truths  and 
human  betterment,  culturine  develops  race-horses  and 
sky  pilots.  The  faked  ones  send  their  daughters  to 
**  finishing  schools,**  where  the*' finish**  is  given  to 
their  last  remnant  of  common  sense,  and  when  they 
graduate  they  usually  have  the  ossified  brain  of  a  gnat. 
At  best  they  learn  only  the  ''purity**  of  pretence  and 
the  prudery  of  pantelettes  in  art.  They  tag  after  the  bats 
of  bigotry,  and  pride  themselves  on  being  dearie  dunce- 
lets  with  a  divinely  appointed  sphere,  limited  to  the  inci- 
dents of  propagation  and  tyrannizing  over  the  housemaid, 
who,  in  her  contributions  to  human  joy  or  useful  labor 
is  their  superior.  Those  postgraduates  of  stupidity  are 
*' womenly  women,**  who  are  proud  that,  geographically, 
their  domain  is  limited  to  the  house  wherein  they  satisfy 
the  husband*s  animal  cravings,  in  exchange  for  a  living, 
and  that  area  around  the  house  within  which  the  slops 
are  thrown.  All  this  they  must  accept  because  the 
preacher  says,  that  the  priest  said,  that  the  book  says, 
that  the  prophet  said,  that  God  said,  that  this  is  the  only 
God-given  realm  of  woman*s  usefulness.  So,  then,  the 
culturined  woman  avoids  all  useful  work  if  possible,' and 
scorns  those  who  would  earn  a  living  by  any  more  ele- 


4  CULTURE   AND  CULTURINE. 

vating  labor  than  to  enter  matrimony  as  a  business  offer- 
ing support. 

The  religious  biped  adopts  its  creed  of  fake-culture  as 
it  selects  its  clothes.  While  some  so  cut  their  garments 
as  to  conceal  physical  deformities,  many  shape  their 
religion  to  cover  moral  malformations.  Others  simply 
obey  blindly  the  mandates  of  some  supposed  ecumenic 
fashion-plate.  Occasionally  a  crack-brained  fellow 
desires  the  notoriety  of  starting  a  new  fad.  Such  be- 
come the  freaks  and  dudelets  of  the  village,  or  the 
prophets  of  a  new  gospel  dispensation. 

Those  who  know  least,  about  the  conditions  of  well- 
being  in  this  life,  can  always  furnish  the  most  infallible 
instructions  for  securing  happiness  in  some  other,  and 
the  culturined  are  willing  to  pay  coin  for  these  spiritual 
pointers  on  the  state  of  the  heavenly  market.  The 
church  is  a  celestial  stock  exchange,  the  priest  is  its  tip- 
ster, and  its  shares  are  all  watered. 

So  long  as  multitudes  are  foolish  enough  to  give  up  a 
tithe  of  their  material  possessions,  for  heavenly  crowns 
of  imaginary  glory,  and  spiritual  harps  of  religious  hal- 
lucination, there  will  be  fakers  enough  to  guarantee  such 
goods,  in  a  world  where  they  have  abolished  body-execu- 
tion for  breach  of  contract. 

Divine  healers  supply  the  cure-alls  for  the  culturined, 
but  not  for  their  own    mental   derangement.     This   is 
proven  by  their  preachments,  but  the  pew-nappers  never 
see  the  point,  because  they  dont  know  the  symptoms  of 
either  stupidity  or  degeneration. 

The  confidence  man  who  sells  **green  goods"  to  greedy 
suckers,  appeals  to  the  same  overwhelming  lust  for  un- 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE.  5 

earned  gain  which  is  the  stock  in  trade  of  gamblers  and 
priests.  For  small  cash  donations  the  latter  deliver  spir- 
itual green-goods,  redeemable  in  title-deeds  to  mansions 
in  the  skies.  Those  who  work  the  spiritual  confidence 
game  help  make  laws  to  punish  the  other  fellow,  for 
working  the  wrong  side  of  the  street. 

Men  with  culturine  ambitions  seek  applause  for  seem- 
ing what  they  are  not.  Imagining  that  it  will  be  so  in 
heaven,  they  give  alms  to  secure  an  undeserved  reputation 
among  the  angels.  Those  who  are  just  or  kind,  only  to 
secure  a  camp-stool  near  the  great  white  throne,  are  like 
men  who  pay  their  small  debts  that  later  they  may  in- 
crease their  permanent  overdraft. 

Persons  who  profess  the  most  certainty  about  their 
own  entrance  into  heaven,  are  the  most  profuse  in  thank- 
ing God  for  not  having  transplanted  them  ;  such  are 
culturined  because  they  don't  know  how  to  think  and 
therefore  never  see  the  humor  of  such  situations. 

Bluff  is  a  passport  to  "good  society''  in  which 
bluster  passes  for  wisdom  and  culturine  for  real  culture. 
Such  persons  at  times  give  aid  and  comfort  to  profes- 
sional reformers  who,  usually  for  a  small  consideration  in 
cash,  are  helping  the  Almighty  to  improve  those  degen  - 
erates  created  in  His  own  image. 

If  you  have  the  manners  of  a  well  trained  coachman, 
can  assume  the  humility  of  a  great  man,  combine  the 
sycophancy  of  a  willing  beggar  and  the  gall  of  a  pirate, 
your  success  as  a  professional  reformer  is  assured  ;  for 
now  you  may  earn  your  salary,  by  advertising  the  cul- 
turined as  philanthropists. 

The  devotees  of  culturine   indiscriminately   employ 


6  CULTURE  AND   CULTURINE. 

fakers,  fools  and  knaves,  not  to  educate,  but  to  think  for 
them,  and  to  promote  their  own  unjust  class  interests. 
The  resultant  atrophy  of  intellect  explains  why  they  are 
so  often  the  victims  of  the  stuflfed  prophets  of  stultified 
progress. 

Men  of  culture  travel  to  secure  opportunities  for  inves- 
tigation. The  culturined  do  the  same  thing  to  avoid 
being  investigated.  Sometimes  they  go  abroad  to  escape 
the  even  worse  torture  of  prolonged  association  with 
the  people  of  their  own  set,  who  are  only  as  stupid  as 
themselves. 

Where  scholars  study  foreign  languages  as  a  means  of 
information  not  otherwise  obtainable,  the  dullards  study 
them  hoping  that  some,  even  more  stupid  than  them- 
selves, will  mistake  this  evidence  of  opportunity  for 
learning,  as  an  equivalent  for  its  achievement. 

Having  need  for  even  the  superficial  evidences  of 
accomplishments,  only  for  misleading  ostentation,  such 
persons  are  often  content  to  study  music  at  a  correspon- 
dence school,  and  French  from  a  phonograph.  When 
the  culturined  have  thus  become  *' linguists,''  if  you 
speak  to  them  of  ^*  etymology,''  they  think  it  has  to  do 
with  bugs  ;  and  ''  philology?"  Oh  !  sure,  it  is  the  sci- 
ence of  rearing  a  filly. 

The  culturined,  when  pressed  into  controversy  about 
vital  matters,  use  the  word  ** spiritual"  as  a  shield  for 
their  ignorance.  The  poet  uses  it  as  a  harmless  and 
meaningless  term,  which,  by  association  of  ideas, 
arouses  agreeable  emotions.  The  mystic  degenerate 
uses  it  as  an  unconscious  designation  of  his  disease. 
This  meaningless  word  always  makes  a  great  impression 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE.  J 

Upon  the  culturined  dudines,  with  deep  emotions   and 
shallow  minds. 

Human  life  should  be  measured  by  deeds,  not  years, 
and  time  not  spent  in  the  increase  and  elevation  of  hu- 
man joys  should  be  counted  as  existence  in  the  citadel 
of  the  dead.  Those  without  culture  value  human  life 
according  to  its  duration  of  idle  ease,  and  the  extent  of 
its  ostentatious  waste. 

The  dupes  to  culturine  are  gullible  only  because,  like 
thieves,  they  endeavor  to  get  valuables  without  paying 
the  just  price.  In  lieu  of  libraries,  they  buy  dummy 
books,  which  wholly  satisfy  their  mental  cravings.  In- 
stead of  gathering  about  them  brilliant  minds  and  their 
output,  many  of  these  afflicted  ones  court  bedizened 
debauchees  and  their  delirium. 

Where  the  cultured  seek  to  make  their  own  lives  wor- 
thy, the  culturined  shine  in  the  time-obscured  gleam  of 
ancestors  who  were  without  merit.  They  organize 
**The  Daughters  of  the  Duke  d'Orang-outang"  and 
'*The  Sons  of  Duchess  Chimpanzee,"  and  consider  it  a 
mark  of  merit  to  themselves  that  the  tree  in  which  their 
ancestors  swung,  by  their  tails  or  necks,  once  cast  a 
shadow  upon  some  great  man  under  it. 

Persons  enameled  with  culturine  still  go  to  church, 
because  they  are  too  ignorant  to  know  that  it  is  no 
longer  the  conservator  of  culture.  They  go,  not  because 
they  love  God  Almighty,  but  because  they  fear  Goddess 
Grundy. 

Mission  chapels,  which  are  spiritual  almshouses,  are 
often  maintained  by  culturined  heiresses,  as  a  vicarious 
atonement  for  the  ancestral  moral  paupers  who  accumula- 


8 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE. 


ted  their  fortune.  However,  they  are  careful  to  atone 
with  only  a  small  part  of  the  income  from  their  ill-gotten 
estate. 

Religion  is  for  the  culturined  the  apotheosis  of  ignor- 
ance, since  man  worships  only  what  is  to  him  mysterious. 
Herbert  Spencer,  though  very  cultured,  added  enlight- 
enment to  this  folly,  without  destroying  its  essence. 
While  others  worship  the  unknown,  in  expectation  of 
a  post  mortem  introduction,  Spencer  gives  reverent  con- 
templation and  silent  adoration  to  the  eternally  unknow- 
able, and  spells  it  with  a  capital  *'  U.'* 

Jesus  said  :  **  Blessed  are  the  poor  in  spirit,  for  theirs 
is  the  kingdom  of  heaven.''  The  bellwether  of  the  cul- 
turined herd  is  the  greatest  spiritual  pauper  on  earth, 
therefore  the  kingdom  of  heaven  is  his.  Persons  desiring 
to  buy  corner  lots  must  apply  early  to  avoid  the  rush. 

Respectability  is  the  mantle  by  which  the  culturined 
conceal  the  absence  of  all  positive  virtues  and  vices. 
When  we  wish  to  characterize  a  man  who  is  neither  wise 
nor  witty,  who  lacks  the  courage  to  be  either  a  reformer 
or  a  criminal,  one  whose  inaction  is  alike  his  only  virtue 
and  his  greatest  known  vice,  such  nonentities  we  call 
**  eminently  respectable,'*  especially  if  they  have  money 
enough  to  give  influence  to  their  otherwise  inconsequen- 
tial, empty-headed  personality,  and  to  rent  a  pew  in  a 
fashionable  church. 

Think  of  those  whose  lives  have  contributed  to  the 
thought  or  directed  the  activities  of  men.  Think  of 
Socrates,  Plato,  Aristotle,  Jesus,  Galileo,  Copernicus. 
Shakespeare,  Milton,  Burns,  Paine,  Humboldt,  Huxley, 
Mill,  Darwin,  Spencer,  Ingersoll,  Bell,  Edison,  Wundt, 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE.  9 

Bernheim,  Ribot,  Haeckel,  and  the  multitude  in  their 
class.  No  biographer  has  ever  yet  presumed  to  insult 
any  of  them  with  the  accusation  of  respectability. 

The  church's  memorial  window  usually  commemo- 
rates persons  of  culturine,  whose  lives  were  devoid  of 
everything  worth  remembering.  The  price  is  paid  by 
living  relatives  of  the  memorialized  dead,  because  the 
former  can  shine  only,  and  are  content  to  shine  even  by 
such  reflected  twilight,  and  because  the  dull  mediocrity 
of  the  family  suggests  no  other  avenue  for  post  mortem 
fame.  Such  windows  are  oftenest  placed  in  **  God's 
house"  because  admiration  by  envious  fools,  for  some 
reason,  not  clear  to  me,  is  deemed  more  creditable  than 
the  surroundings  of  a  rogue's  gallery,  and  because  this 
religious  hall  of  fame  is  always  open  to  those  with  little 
merit  and  much  money. 

The  culturined  replace  decency  with  diseased  modesty. 
When  this  results  not  from  mere  ignorant  parroting,  it 
is  the  product  of  diseased  sex-sensitiveness.  This  com- 
pels them  to  live  lives  of  ostentatious  ** purity,"  and  to 
support  vice  societies— that  is,  societies  run  by  preten- 
tious grafters  with  whom  the  manufacture  of  the  artifi- 
cial and  misleading  evidences  of  **  purity  "  is  a  profitable 
profession.  Those  who  live  morally  for  a  salary,  by  the 
suppression  of  the  natural  in  others  create  a  merely  ver- 
bal purity,  with  its  consequent  accompaniment  of  mor- 
bid nastiness  of  thinking.  This  encouraged  vice  is  the 
manufactured  '*  purity  "  which  gives  these  organizations 
of  the  afflicted  the  name  of  **vice  societies." 

Persons  with  an  overload  of  culturine  in  their  think- 
tank  are  frequently  very  **  pure  "  of  eye  and  ear,  while 


lO 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE. 


CULTURE  AND  CULTURINE. 


II 


r  ii 


in  public.  However,  they  unconsciously  plead  **guilty '' 
as  to  their  real  moral  status  when  they  indiscreetly 
boast  of  their  inability  to  resist  even  the  temptation 
held  out  by  a  nude  marble  statue,  and  their  capacity  for 
being  "insulted'*  by  a  nude  baby,  painted  on  canvas. 
Persons  of  real  culture  will  not  get  angry  over  these 
dearies,  with  the  minds  of  putrid  **  morality.'*  We 
must  be  sorry  for  them  when  we  realize  that  they  can 
no  more  help  it  than  can  the  victim  of  small-pox  pre- 
vent the  papular  eruption. 

Lacking  the  courage  of  their  propensities,  many  of 
the  culturined  secure  to  themselves  that  vicarious  enjoy- 
ment of  the  lasciviousness  of  others,  which  comes  to 
lewd  minds,  by  an  imaginative  dwelling  upon  the  salac- 
ity of  those  whose  conduct  induces  scandal.  Hence  the 
fondness  of  many  for  gossip.  As  hypocrisy  is  the  hom- 
age which  vice  pays  to  virtue,  so  the  slanders  of  medi- 
ocrity are  often  the  credentials  of  genius.  Thus  it  is 
that  to  be  wanting  in  respectability  or  to  be  denounced 
as  ** impure'*  is  often  but  a  testimonial  to  one's  healthy- 
mindedness  and  virtue.  Those  who  use  culturette  never 
manicure  their  own  minds. 

As  a  qualification  for  **  good  society,"  the  number  of 
your  servants  is  of  more  importance  than  the  honesty  of 
your  business  methods.  So  it  is  that  we  have  many 
philanthropic  institutions  established  by  the  beneficia- 
ries of  legalized  theft,  but  not  one,  the  whole  world 
over,  for  the  development  of  our  slowly  refining  sense 
of  economic  justice.  The  beneficiaries  of  **  vested" 
wrongs  have  as  genuine  a  fear  of  real  justice  as  the  high- 


wayman has  for  a  courageous  sheriff,  and  for  the  same 
reason. 

Culturine  is  the  mask  behind  which  ignorance  is  con- 
cealed ;  it  is  the  secretiveness  of  the  intellectual  snob- 
berines,  whose  refinement  is  but  a  thinly  varnished 
barbarity,  an  ostentatious  concealment  of  a  vacuum  in 
the  space  immediately  under  their  hats. 

Good  manners,  as  understood  in  *'good"  society, 
seem  to  signify  little  more  than  that  while  in  the  chosen 
circle  you  will  always  employ  the  brazen,  flippant  in- 
sincerity of  the  harlot,  in  jollying  the  pin-headed  snobs 
who  dispense  social  favors.  If,  to  those  who  are  be- 
smeared with  culturette,  you  speak  the  word  **  science," 
they  think  either  that  you  mean  dexterity  in  boxing  or 
that  stupendous  asininity  miscalled  Christian  Science. 
Speak  of  **  social  service,"  and  they  measure  it  by  the 
quality  of  the  boozy  bliss  which  you  distribute,  or  the 
quantity  of  circus  lemonade  you  buy  at  the  church  fair. 
Being  short  in  intellect  and  long  in  *' dough,"  they  have 
no  means  of  entertaining  their  friends  except  to  supply 
music,  meat  and  Mumm's. 

In  the  mind  of  the  culturined  there  is  no  serious 
thought  of  justice,  except  to  escape  it.  The  world  is 
viewed  as  a  chess  game  ;  our  fellow  humans  are  the 
things  played  with.  Wisdom  therefore  consists  in  play- 
ing the  game  of  human  nature  with  financial  advantage 
and  idle,  disgraceful  ease  to  one's  self.  The  only  serious 
purpose  of  such  a  life  being  to  exercise  the  greatest  pos- 
sible cunning  in  the  world's  game  of  cheat,  they  quite 
sincerely  (but  not  rationally)  believe  that  there  is  a 
divine  purpose  in  all  creation  ;  therefore  God  made  the 


12 


CULTURE   AND   CULTURINK. 


sucker  to  be  worked,  and  those  who  fleece  him  are  but 
relifyiously  executing  the  Creator's  design. 

Persons  of  real  culture  will  now  join  in  the  following 
prayer  of  Prof.  Huxley. 

*' Would  that  ever>'  woman-child  born  into  the  world 
were  trained  to  be  a  lady,  and  every  man-child  a  gentle- 
man !  But  then  I  do  not  use  those  much-abused  words 
by  way  of  distinguishing  people  who  wear  fine  clothes, 
and  live  in  fine  houses,  and  talk  aristocratic  slang,  from 
those  who  go  about  in  fustian,  and  live  in  back  slums, 
and  talk  gutter  slang.  Some  inborn  plebeian  blindness, 
in  fact,  prevents  me  from  understanding  what  advantage 
the  former  have  over  the  latter.  I  have  never  even  been 
able  to  understand  why  pigeon-shooting  at  Hurlingham 
should  be  refined  and  polite,  while  a  rat-killing  match 
in  White-chapel  is  low  ;  or  why  'Svhat  a  lark''  should 
be  coarse,  when  one  hears  *'how  awfully  jolly  "  drop 
from  the  most  refined  lips  twenty  times  in  an  evening. 
Thoughtfulness  for  others,  generosity,  modesty,  and 
self-respect,  are  the  qualities  which  make  a  real  gentle- 
man or  lady,  as  distinguished  from  the  veneered  article 
which  commonly  goes  by  that  name." 

Here,  then  !  I  propose  this  toast  :  "  To  Hell  with  the 
culturine  of  the  churched  and  the  well-born,  and  up  with 
the  Philistines  of  Science,  with  clear  vision  and  plain 
speaking." 

Theodore  Schroeder. 

6 J  East  S9th  St.,  N.  V.  City 


I 


I  "I' 


( 


. 


u.  'Aw^Dti'oatroMv, 


The  First  National  Bank» 

OGDEN,   UTAH. 

CAPITAL  yi^vw-oB.        PftoriTff  ffipBOjifO. 


DATIQ  ICCLKt,  riwL 
|OHM  PlNOIlli,  CaiklM. 


TWOMAS  D.  D»   VlM-PMt. 
JA*.  ?.  ■UKTON.AW^Ca^ 


Ogden,    Utali     %/l^ViQ^. 


To  Vhon  It  Hay  Coaoem:- 

The  Varmers  Utah  Loan  ABsoolatlo&t  which  was 
recently  organized  at  LogaOt  Utah»   for  the  purpose  of  making  and  aelliag 
first  Mortgage  loans  on  farm  property,   is  officered  \>y  men  with  whom  we 
hS7e  had  intimate  huslness  relations*       We  hare  found  them  honest i   cOo- 
solentlouSf    oonserratlTe  men.  Their  extended  experlenoe  has  made  then 

famllar  with  the  economic  conditions  prerailing  here,    and  that  they  are 
capa"ble  of  grasping  the  situation  la  e-rldenoed  hy  the  success  they  hare 
won.       Ve  hare  no  hesitancy  in  recommending  them  to  the  consideration  of 
those  who  wish  safe  and  profitable  investments.       We  helieve  they  would 


not  make   any  loans,   nor  offer  to  sell  any  mo 
safe  lirrestmsnts* 

Yours  t 


tgages  that   ax^e  not  entirely 


()  A  WORD  TO  THE  WISE! 


The  First  Mortgages  above  referred  to  are  as  safe  as 
Government  Bonds.  The  security  is  three  times  the  value  of  the 
sum  loaned.  They  will  net  you  6  per  cent.  Interest  col- 
lected by  me  without  charge.  These  First  Mortgages,  in 
sums  from  $250  upwards,  are  for  sale  by  me.    Investigation 

and  correspondence  solicited. 

THEO.  SCHROEDER, 

63  East  59th  St.,  New  York  City. 


U.  «.°>  Dv^ottroNv, 


12 


CULTURE   AND  CULTURINK. 


sucker  to  be  worked,  and  those  who  fleece  him  are  but 
relio^ionslv  execntincr  the  Creator's  desimi. 

Persons  of  real  culture  will  now  join  in  the  following 
prayer  of  Prof.  Huxley. 

'•  Would  that  every  woman-child  born  into  the  world 
were  trained  to  be  a  ladv,  and  every  man-child  a  irentle. 
man  !  But  then  I  do  not  use  those  much-abused  words 
by  way  of  distinoruishinji^  people  who  wear  fine  clothes, 
and  live  in  fine  houses,  and  talk  aristocratic  slang,  from 
those  who  go  about  in  fustian,  and  live  in  back  slums, 
and  talk  gutter  slang.  Some  inborn  plebeian  blindness, 
in  fact,  prevents  me  from  understanding  what  advantage 
the  former  have  over  the  latter.  I  have  never  even  been 
able  to  understand  why  pigeon-shooting  at  Hurlingham 
should  be  refined  and  polite,  while  a  rat-killing  match 
in  White-chapel  is  low  ;  or  why  ''what  a  lark''  should 
be  coarse,  when  one  hears  "how  awfully  jolly '*  drop 
from  the  most  refined  lips  twenty  times  in  an  evening. 
Thoughtfulness  for  others,  generosity,  modesty,  and 
self-respect,  are  the  qualities  which  make  a  real  gentle- 
man or  lady,  as  distinguished  from  the  veneered  article 
w^hich  commonlv  goes  bv  that  name." 

Here,  then  !  I  propose  this  toast  :  ''  To  Hell  with  the 
culturine  of  the  churched  and  the  well-born,  and  up  with 
the  Philistines  of  Science,  with  clear  vision  and  plain 
speaking." 

Thkodork  Schrokdkr. 

6 J  East ^gth  St.,  N,  Y.  City 


t 


j» 


The  First  National  Bank« 

OGDEN,  UTAH. 

CAriTAL  pfOfUija^.        PROflTf  inipoajx). 


DAVIO  ICCLU,  PrML 
JOHN  PlNCftlt,  Cackicr. 


THOMAS  D.  DII   ViM-Pml. 
JAS.  r.  BUKTON,  Mi\  CMk 


Ogdcn,    Utah     8/LS-1904. 


To  Whoa  It  May  Conoem:- 

The  VarmerB  Utah  Loan  Assoclationt  which  was 
recently  organized  at  LogaHi  Utaht   for  the  purpoae  of  fflaklng  and  aelling 
first  Bortgage  loans  on  farm  property,   Is  officered  hy  laen  with  whom  we 
hare  had  intimate  hualness  relations*      We  hare  found  them  honest,  con- 
sclent louBi   oonserratlTe  men.  Their  extended  experience  has  made  them 

famllar  with  the  economic  conditions  preralllng  here,    and  that  they  are 
oapahlo  of  grasping  the   situation  is  cTldenoed  hy  the  success  they  have 
won*       Ws  hare  no  hesitancy  in  reoommendlng  them  to  the  consideration  of 
those  who  wish  safe  and  profitable  inyestments*       We  helleTS  they  would 


not  make  any  loans,  nor  offer  to  sell  any  mo 
safe  Inrestments* 

Yours  tr 


tgages  that   ax*e  not  sntirelj 


A  WORD   10  THE  WISE! 

The  First  Mortgages  above  referred  to  are  as  safe  as 
Government  Bonds.  The  security  is  three  times  the  value  of  the 
sum  loaned.  They  will  net  you  6  per  cent.  Interest  col- 
lected by  me  without  charge.  These  First  Mortgages,  in 
sums  from  $250  upwards,  are  for  sale  by  me.     Investigation 

and  correspondence  solicited. 

THEO.  SCHROEDER, 

63  East  59th  St.,  New  York  City. 


^OS  PiMGRCCPcuiecirr. 
J  w  Aeaorr.vici  p>cst 


JOSCPH  SCpwatOTT.V^c 

7206 


JAMES  MN«»a.O«NiM 


DIRECTORS 

.MS  PtHCtte.  J  W  ASBOTT 

joscPN  scoiwci>orr  jamcs  mack 

M.SBW0WNIN9  AN0(I3  r  <MRia«Tr 

CKCtusoM  MiiiiER  scovvcMorr 

CMAftkCS  tVMtn  JOS  S  PCCRV 


CAPITA!. 

$  173,000 


^€/e?lU^^  8A7/t)4, 


To  Vhoa  It  Jfay  Concora:- 

Thfl  Fansers  Utah  Loan  Asscelaticn  of  Logan»  dtib,  wm  Incor- 
porated in  1903,  and  has  gtran  i^entloA  to  making  and  selling  loans 
on  farms, 

Bb  have  been  acquainted  for  over  twenty  years  with  its  cfficers» 
who  are  well  known  for  their- honor  and  "business  ability. 

They  have  hcen  closely  identifie* 
of  the  State,   and  so  are  faailar  withi 

They  are  men  of  unquestionable 
they  would  neither  make  nor  Offer  for 
respects  a  safe  investment* 

Tours  truly, 


V 


I 


\\ 


n 


\ 


A  WORD  TO  THE  WISE! 

Tte  First  Mortgages  above  referred  to  are  as  safe  as 
Goverment  Bonds.  The  security  is  three  times  the  value  of  the 
sum  loaned.  They  will  net  you  6  per  cent.  Interest  col- 
lected by  me  without  charge.  These  First  Mortgages,  in 
sums  from  $250  upwards,  arc  for  sale  by  me.  Investigation 
and  correspondence  solicited. 

THEO,  5CHR0EDER. 

63  East  .       St..  New  York  City. 


i. 


